DISOWNED DESIRE P1

A few days ago, i was talking to a frend of mine on msn. I don't know this person very well...neva really met properly in-person...but we've been talking abt God and life whenever we do chat online. There is not too much I can say, but it just saddens me to know that there are people out there who have given up the journey to desire, desire a life that was made for them, "life in abundance".

When the desire is too much to bear, we often bury it beneath frenzied thoughts and activities or escape it by dulling our immediate consciousness of living. It is possible to run away from the desire for years, even decades, at a time, but we cannot eradicate it entirely. It keeps touching us in little glimpses and hints in our dreams, our hopes, our unguarded moments.

(May, The Awakened Heart)

Sometimes i feel that CHristianity has come to the point where we believe that there is no higher aspiration for the human soul than to be nice. We are producing a generation of men and women whose rgeatest virtue is that they don't offend anyone. Then we wonder why there is not more passion for Christ in the church? But how can we hunger and thirst after God if we ceased hungering and thirsting altogether?

Just last weekend, John Bevere spoke at one of the meetings at church. At the end of the meeting, he suddnely called all the young people in the congregation to come up on stage and be prayed for. He was just challenging us if we wanted more of God, if we desired more of Him, if we were passiobnate for Him. I went up there, i raised my hands, i did wat most of the youths did. I prayed, i desired, i hungered for Him. However, when i went home and thought about what had happened, a part of me was so disappointed with myself and my attitude.

I thought to myself: if i was that hungry for God, if i was passionate and desperately desired for Him, why didn't i feel like i had given my all in search for Him, in crying out desperately for Him? When i was up there on stage, i did what most people did...i quietly prayed, quietly hungered, quietly...Is that the expressiobn of my heart's cry, to quietly want Him?

Hmm....something maybe you should think about.

Cheryl

THE JOURNEY OF DESIRE

Seaching for the LIFE we've only dreamed of...if only...

Just had a great weekend, being deeply impacted and blessed by John Bevere's messages. In sum, his messages were all about living the God-intended life for every christian - to have a passionate and intimate relationship with our FIRST LOVE. After listening to him, he really made me think about so many things...everything about what it means to be a christian. And i came up with this:

There is a secret set within each of our hearts. This secert remains hidden for the most part of our deepest selves. It is the desire for life as it was meant to be. Somehow, it seems to come and go. But again and again ti returns to us, this yearning that cries out for the life we prize. And though it seems to taunt us, and may at times cause us great pain, we know when it returns that is is priceless. For if we could recover this desire, unearth it from beneath all other distractions (life's business), and embrace it as our deepest treasure, we would discover the secret of our existence.

Unfortunately, the greatest tragedy anyone could experience is to give up the search, the life. Nothing is of greater importance than the life of our deep heart. John Eldredge wrote "to lose heart is to lose everything....if we were to bring our hearts along in our life's journey, we simply must not, we cannot, abandon this desire".

Come to think of it, there are moments in life where we wished time stand still. Something in your heart says, Finally - it has come. This is what I was made for. Those are the desires of my heart.

A PRAYER FOR YOU

"I'm sure there are people here who are psasionate to write songs and lead worship. I really believe that what we are seeing is God trying to start something all over the earth. Incredible songs that are going to be written that touch a generation and draw a broken, hurting generationg and draw them to a loving Father, and revolutionize their life for all eternity. So if that is something that's inside of you and you say 'that's a dream of mine', here is a prayer for you that God will do something in your heart.

Father God rite now...you see these hearts with the desire to worship you, with the desire to lift up the name of Jesus, with the desire of wanting to draw people into your presenece, and i pray father tonite that you will seal something inside of them. Stir them like they've never been stirred before. I pray Father that they will choose not to live average lives. Father that they will choose not to just draw a little bit closer to you and just taste a little bit of you. But Father, they would die right here to all there is of you and who you are. And Father as they know you, that Lord out of their giftedness and out of their creativity, out of what you've placed inside of them, Lord we pray that incredible songs will come forth. That music will come out.

Father that worship will be created that will touch you and your generation and draw closer to you. Father we believe that when we worship You and as we give off our best to You, our giftings our talents Lord, that we can see the church built right across the earth in a way that has never been built before. Use these young men and women to be part of this new generation that truly gives their all to worship and praising the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Amen."

"Father i pray for youth leaders, for youth pastors. Lord i pray for those who are here, desiring to one day serve you in reaching out to this generation. I pray Father even now God that you would stir greater vision within them. I pray that you'll refresh them right now. Father i pray that they wouldn't give up. Your word says that they wouldn't grow weary in doing good because in due season they are going to reap and they are going to keep on reaping a mighty harvest of young men n women who are going to grow up.

And Father we declare that we are going to see the church built across the world. Father use these leaders who will speak into the generation who are broken and hurting and condused and seem so lost and dark sometimes. Father that they may bring the light to them that it shines so bright and bring them out of darkness, bring them into your kingdom. Father we thank you for the great fruit that each of these lives are going to bear.Amen"

DREAMING...

Have you ever dreamnt of something out of this world? I'm not talking about the dreams you have when u r like super tired, or dreaming of the perfect guy or gurl. I'm refering to dreams that may become a reality. Dreams that would change lives....

You know how many preachers always encourage people to DREAM BIG for God? I was just wondering if there will ever be a time when we dream BIG dreams that seems so impossible and God goes, that's not big enuf...dream bigger? I have.

One of my dream is to be able to write songs of heaven. Songs that will bring life to the lifeless, hope to the hopeless, strength to the weak, healing to the sick, comfort to the weary.Songs that are so personal to an individual but yet relevant to everyone going through any circumstances. I want to write songs that will impact lives and draw them closer to Him who created all things. Is this dream BIG enuf? Can God beat that dream of mine? Or does he have something planned for me which is far more out of this world then that? I mean..writing songs is kinda out of this world for me...but is there something better than that?

I guess that is why life is so exciting. Never knew living a christian lifestyle can be so 'on the edge' huh! Every morning I wake up, despite recognising that i have issues in life, I still thank God for His mercy and grace...His abundant love for me. And i always feel excited about the new day ahead...looking forward to see what comes my way. Life is amzing...because He is involve. I dunnoe if i make much sense but i just want to say that Life is worth living...even though it may be tough. And it is exciting to see dreams coming true.

UNITED WE STAND

See this...its the latest United Live CD/DVD - United We Stand. Awesome stuff i tell you. I'm actually listening to it right now...in uni. Hahaha!!

I had the opportunity to see the DVD. I went to the documentary section and listened to those involved in Hillsong United. People like Joel, Marty, Phil etc....were just sharing about how they started out with nothing, but by God's great encounter during one summer camp, history was made.

Its been a long time since i heard such inspirational stuff from young people who share the same passion as i do. Honestly, my heart is just dieing to go out there and meet people who share the passion of young people and music. Andy, Chin, Pastor Simon, Aunty Anna...i miss the long conversations we have just talking and sharing about how we can better improve our youth ministry and the worship team. I miss the late nites where we have our leaders meetings @ Pastor's house. Remember the time where we were talking about the outfits for dr@stix...adding a Star Wars theme to the whole production. Hahaha....so fun. Miss those times.

Do apologise for those of you who have no clue withwhat i'm talking.

Anyway, after watching that documentary of how Hillsong United evolve into a group of young musicians passionate about bringing a new song to Him, I just feel like taking a plane back to Singapore and accepting the job. *So Pastor...is the job still available for me?? Hehehe....*

Just an encouragement to all my DRians....specifically to the worship team....Hillsong United did not start out very great. They had their moments of having people who were tone-deaf to lead worship once a month. Hahaha....*remember those times - Jannen....hehehe* ANyway, they were pretty ordinary too. You should seriously see the DVD. At the end of the day, it was the real desperate cry from those involve in the ministry that really brought them to where they are toady. I believe that our youth ministry is talented. The question is how much do we desire to see God moving in our youth group. It's possible guys!!

At the moment, my heart is just yearning to see what God has install for me and for the minsitry that I am apart of...be it CityLife (RIOT YOUTH) or Moriah (DUNAMIS ROCK). These are exciting times. We need to really pick up our game, be who God has called us to be, a generation of history makers, and start DREAMING BIG for HIS CAUSE.

God bless,
Cheryl

BARENAKED WORSHIP

Okay...before you start jumping to any conclusions about what that title means...i would like to say this "its not wat you're thinking" so forget it. HEhehehe.....Anyway, i just came back from our music practice for tis wednesday's network meeting (church thingy). And i tink it has been such a long long time since we, as a church, worship God without much music. Yeah, this wednesday we will be having a praise n worship session unplugged...literally...just a piano n a choir...or at least we'd like to think we are a choir.

How long has it been since we really worshipped God from the very depths of our soul, not because the music was creating the enivonrment by which we are worshipping Him..but really its becoz we are desperate to declare His majesty and Beauty? When was the last time when music wasn't drawing attention away from God? When was it the last time people experienced worship stripped bare?

The song "Heart of Worship" it says "when the music fades, and all is stripped away, and i simply come" Can we still do that, come to Him in awe even when there is no music to guide our emotions? "longing just to bring, something thats of worth, that will bless Your heart" Have we lost the true meaning of worship in the midst of all the wonderful music that accompanies with it? "I'm coming back to the heart of worship, when its all about you, its all about you Jesus"

THANK GOD I FOUND YOU!

Last nite...or yesterday rather was a tough day for me. A mini-nervous breakdown you can call it. It was almost like life came to halt for a moment and every possible life issue i can think of started coming over me. I felt so overwhelmed...and i just didn't noe how to handle that moment. Was it better to cry or just laugh it out?

Didn't really want to go to the all-church prayer meeting last nite, just becoz not many people were going and i had assignments to finish up. But something in me wanted to just go...n see what God was doing. I think i needed to see for myself or hear at least that God was still relevant in my life....still working His wonders in people's lives. And I'm glad i went. For those of you who went, you would probably agree with me that it was a very encouraging session for the church n for many individuals.

At the start of the meeting, i was like, yup music is good as usual...cool! But then when we started singing "God He REigns"...i cldn't help but lay everything to His feet. It is quite amazing how God is able to minister to you through worship. I felt myself falling into two parts. One part of me know that I am a child of God and that no harm will come to me...but another part of me was just finding it so difficult to really believe that everything will be all right...coz at the moment, everything seems to much to handle. But when Mark Conner told us that we have to grab hold of the authority that we can conquer any battles....battles with the flesh, with the mind....we've got to speak out against our mountains. And that was what i did, silently where i sat.

Hmmm....this morning, when i woke up, i felt so light inside. Although life still has its problems, knowing that He is watching over me makes it all that better.

THANK GOD I FOUND YOU!
Cheryl

YA CAMP!!

Hello everyone....

its been a while since my last entry. That was because life has been really busy...too busy to try and comment on it. But i guess having the weekend getaway to camp Howqua for our young adults camp was a good time to relax and refocus on what is really important.

Camp was awesome. Didn't really want to go at the beginning because of all the assignments. But went anyway. Told myself, since u are going, might as well expect something from God then... rather than waste your time ... And i did. Since its my last year of studies, by the end of the year i have to decide if i will be staying in Australia or going back to my lovely home. Basically, what is my next calling in life after my studies? Tough decision to make. So i said, "Lord, give me more direction." So did he answer my prayer?He kinda did. Of coz, not giving me a specific answer but just some guiding principles that will help me make a better decision.

WISDOM PRINCIPLE 1: You may not be at your POSITION OF DESTINY (the specific calling - ie. youth pastor) but you may be at your PLACE OF DESTINY (the field of interest - ie. helping young kids or people in general). Dunnoe if i made any sense there.

WISDOM PRINCIPLE 2: Wherever you are at in life, if you feel lost and frustrated of waiting for a specific answer, STOP WASTING TIME getting annoyed at God. Rather, take the opportunity to BE A BLESSING and CHAMPION OTHER'S CAUSE. That was a great reminder for me. Often i always think of myself and what i want to do...seldom i think about what i can do to help others fulfill their dreams and passion.

So yeah...these two were the most remembered lessons i took home with me.

I guess away from my personal agenda, the camp was the best one ever. The witness of unity was so evident. Although YA is going through a transition phase....somehow i am reassured that it is going according to the plan God has set out for this ministry. Just to see everyone coming together, supporting each other with love was so awesome. I guess the experience at camp wasn't that explosive in that sense, but the gentle impact that it had on the ministry internally was awesome. YA is getting somewhere i'm sure!!

Hmmm...there are other highlights at camp. i may share it some other time...or if u asked me. Some were really suprising ones, while others were just plain embarrassing....man, can't believe it happened man!! Anyway, gtg now...so stay true to yourself and may God bless you!

Cheryl